Over the years I’ve realized something interesting.
A lot of the success principles people learn in business are actually marriage principles in disguise.
But I’ve also learned that marriage is different in some very important ways.
For years I studied personal growth, leadership, and success. I listened to audios, went to conferences, read books, and tried to apply those principles to my life. What I didn’t realize at the time was that many of the same principles that help you succeed in business can also help you build a stronger marriage if you apply them the right way.
In business you are taught learn, study, and then act.
In marriage, if you are willing to learn, study, and then act on what you learn about communication, forgiveness, and understanding each other, your marriage will grow stronger.
The difference is in business you can learn skills. In marriage you also have to learn patience, grace, and humility.
In business you are taught to be all in.
Marriage works the same way. When you treat your marriage like something you are fully committed to, not something you can walk away from when it gets hard, it changes the way you fight for each other.
But unlike business, marriage is not about winning. Sometimes the strongest marriages are built when both people are willing to lose an argument to keep the relationship strong.
In business you are told to feed your mind daily with motivation and encouragement.
Marriage needs the same thing. When you invest time learning how to communicate better, love better, and understand each other better, your relationship gets stronger over time.
The difference is that in marriage, encouragement matters more than motivation. Your spouse needs to know they are loved, not managed.
In business you are taught to attend events, conferences, and trainings to grow.
In marriage, going to retreats, conferences, or even just taking time to work on your relationship can make a huge difference. Strong marriages don’t happen by accident. They are built on purpose.
But marriage isn’t a project you complete. It’s a relationship you keep choosing every day.
In business you are taught to develop people skills.
Marriage is built on people skills. Listening, patience, humility, and learning how to speak to each other with respect will take you further in marriage than almost anything else.
The difference is that in business you can walk away from difficult people. In marriage you learn how to grow together instead of walking away.
In business you are told to associate with people who are where you want to be.
Marriage works the same way. When you spend time around couples who love each other, respect each other, and have made it through hard seasons, it reminds you what is possible.
But marriage also means standing together when life doesn’t look the way you thought it would.
And one of the biggest principles I ever learned in business was to turn it over to God.
The same is true for marriage. When you put God at the center, you stop trying to control everything and start learning how to trust Him with the parts you can’t fix.
I’m not saying marriage should feel like a business.
In fact, some of the biggest mistakes happen when you treat it like one.
Business runs on performance.
Marriage runs on commitment.
Business measures success by results.
Marriage measures success by faithfulness.
Business can be replaced.
Marriage is meant to last.
Sandy and I have learned this the hard way over the years. Marriage isn’t something you build once. It’s something you keep building. Through good seasons, hard seasons, and seasons where you wonder if you’re going to make it.
If you treat your marriage like a lifelong journey instead of something temporary, you’ll fight for it differently.
And when two people decide they are not quitting on each other, even when life gets hard, that’s when a marriage becomes strong.
— Chris Benton
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