Originally interviewed in early 2021, this conversation captures Mya Xeller before she went on to earn the title of Miss Connecticut Teen USA 2022.
Some people discover confidence through success.
Others discover success through confidence.
Mya Xeller's story reflects something even deeper—discovering purpose through service.
A Connecticut native, Mya first stepped into the spotlight through competitive dance before expanding into pageantry, modeling, acting, and television. While she has earned recognition through pageant titles, modeling opportunities, and her appearance on Next Big Thing NYC, her greatest accomplishments extend far beyond entertainment.
Throughout her journey, Mya has consistently used every opportunity to promote leadership, kindness, and community involvement. Inspired by the loss of her aunt to breast cancer, she founded All About Pink, a platform dedicated to raising awareness, supporting breast cancer organizations, and encouraging young people to use their voices for positive change.
Her philosophy challenges many common misconceptions about pageantry. Rather than viewing crowns as symbols of beauty alone, she believes they represent responsibility. Community service, leadership, fundraising, public speaking, and mentoring younger generations have become central parts of her mission.
What makes Mya especially compelling is her maturity. Even at a young age, she speaks less about becoming famous than about becoming someone worthy of influence. She openly discusses authenticity, resilience, handling online criticism, honoring family sacrifices, and remaining grounded regardless of future success.
Her conversation on The Chris & Sandy Show captures a young leader early in her journey, offering timeless lessons that continue to resonate with anyone pursuing purpose, confidence, and meaningful success.
More Than a Crown: How Mya Xeller Is Using Purpose to Define Success
Most people see the crown before they see the character.
They notice the pageant titles, modeling photos, television appearances, carefully curated social media posts, and polished public image. It's easy to assume those are the story.
During her conversation on The Chris & Sandy Show, Mya Xeller quietly proves that those accomplishments are only the surface.
Beneath them is a young woman whose greatest ambition isn't becoming famous—it's becoming useful.
Recorded during the uncertainty of the COVID era, this interview has aged remarkably well because it spends very little time talking about temporary projects and a great deal of time discussing timeless principles.
The conversation explores authenticity, leadership, resilience, community service, family, purpose, and what it really means to use influence responsibly.
Years later, those themes feel even more relevant than they did when the interview first aired.
Behind the Crown Is a Young Woman Learning to Lead
Mya's journey into pageantry didn't begin with dreams of winning crowns.
Like many young performers, it started with dance.
After years of competitive dancing, she became curious about pageants when she watched other dancers begin competing.
At just eleven years old, she entered her first pageant.
She won.
That victory wasn't simply exciting.
It became confirmation that she had discovered something she genuinely loved.
What followed wasn't an obsession with trophies.
Instead, pageantry became a classroom.
She learned public speaking.
Interviewing.
Leadership.
Confidence.
Community involvement.
Personal responsibility.
Throughout the interview she repeatedly returns to one point many people misunderstand:
Modern pageantry isn't simply about appearance.
Success requires countless hours invested away from the stage.
Contestants build platforms.
Organize fundraisers.
Volunteer.
Document community service.
Conduct interviews.
Represent organizations.
Lead initiatives.
In many ways, the crown simply becomes the visible symbol of invisible work.
That perspective challenges one of society's most common misconceptions.
Turning Personal Loss Into Purpose
Every meaningful platform usually begins with a personal story.
For Mya, that story centers on losing her aunt to breast cancer.
She remembers witnessing the emotional impact the disease had across her family—not only on the person fighting cancer but on everyone who loved her.
Rather than allowing that experience to remain painful history, she transformed it into action.
She created All About Pink, an initiative dedicated to breast cancer awareness and fundraising.
COVID delayed many of the events she originally envisioned, but it never stopped the mission itself.
Instead of quitting, she adapted.
She continued planning.
Building partnerships.
Designing merchandise.
Preparing fundraisers.
Looking for ways to continue helping despite restrictions.
One of the interview's most moving moments comes when she discusses volunteering at Yale New Haven Hospital, helping breast cancer patients choose clothing, wigs, and knitted caps during treatment.
She isn't describing charity from a distance.
She's describing people.
Women trying to feel beautiful while facing one of the hardest battles imaginable.
It's impossible not to notice the compassion in her voice.
Even at a young age, she understands something many adults overlook:
Sometimes dignity is one of the greatest gifts we can give another person.
Success Without Losing Yourself
As careers grow, identity often becomes one of the greatest challenges.
People begin performing versions of themselves instead of simply living as themselves.
Mya openly admits she once struggled with this.
Early in pageantry she worried about saying the right thing.
Acting the right way.
Giving perfect interview answers.
Trying to become whoever she thought judges wanted.
Eventually she realized something freeing.
Authenticity performs better than performance.
Instead of carefully constructing an interview personality, she simply became herself.
That decision changed everything.
Her confidence improved.
Her conversations became natural.
Her interviews felt genuine.
Ironically, the less she tried to impress people, the stronger impression she made.
Chris shares similar advice he once received while launching The Chris & Sandy Show:
Stay authentic.
You may grow slower.
But you'll attract the right audience.
That exchange becomes one of the interview's defining moments because it speaks to every profession—not just entertainment.
Whether someone is building a business, raising a family, leading a nonprofit, or creating content online, authenticity remains one of the few qualities that never loses value.
Social Media Doesn't Define Your Worth
One topic today's audiences will especially appreciate is Mya's perspective on online criticism.
She doesn't deny cyberbullying exists.
She has experienced it herself.
Fake accounts.
Negative messages.
Cruel comments.
Instead of becoming bitter, she developed a healthier perspective.
If someone spends their time constantly watching you, criticizing you, and commenting on everything you do, they are investing attention in your life.
Rather than allowing those voices to control her emotions, she chooses not to respond.
Her philosophy is remarkably simple.
If you don't like someone…
Don't follow them.
Don't engage with them.
Keep moving.
It sounds obvious.
Yet in today's social media culture, it's surprisingly rare.
Her advice feels refreshingly mature, especially coming from someone who grew up in the digital generation most affected by online comparison.
A Mother's Quiet Sacrifice
Every successful person has people whose names rarely make the headlines.
One of the most heartfelt moments of this conversation comes when Chris intentionally shifts the spotlight away from Mya and asks about the people behind her success.
Without hesitation, she begins talking about her mother.
Her mother worked six days a week.
Long hours.
Demanding schedules.
Very little free time.
Yet somehow she continually found ways to make her daughter's dreams possible.
Mya recalls weekends where they would travel into New York late Friday night so she could participate in modeling opportunities.
The following morning, her mother would leave before sunrise, drive back to Connecticut to work an entire day, then return to New York that evening to pick her daughter up.
Those aren't glamorous moments.
There are no trophies for that.
No social media applause.
No red carpets.
Just sacrifice.
It's one of the interview's most beautiful reminders that every visible success usually rests upon invisible acts of love.
Mya also recognizes her pageant coach, dance instructor, singing teacher, television producer, family, and close friends.
Rather than viewing success as an individual achievement, she consistently describes it as a shared accomplishment.
That humility becomes one of the defining characteristics of the interview.
The Kind of Success Worth Chasing
Perhaps the most revealing answer comes near the end of the conversation.
Chris asks where she hopes to be five years from now.
Many young entertainers would answer by listing awards.
Television shows.
Followers.
Money.
Fame.
Instead, Mya starts somewhere entirely different.
She wants to be happy.
Healthy.
Authentic.
Comfortable in her own skin.
Only after those priorities does she begin discussing career goals.
That order matters.
It reveals someone whose identity is rooted internally rather than externally.
Later, Chris asks an even deeper question:
If today's Mya could meet her future successful self, what would she want to remind her?
Her answer is remarkably simple.
"You're still just Mya from Connecticut."
In one sentence she summarizes the entire interview.
Never become so impressed with your accomplishments that you forget the person who earned them.
That lesson transcends entertainment.
It applies to business.
Leadership.
Parenting.
Faith.
Marriage.
Success has a way of changing circumstances.
Character determines whether it changes the person.
7 LESSONS WE LEARNED FROM THIS CONVERSATION
Lesson One
Success Means Very Little If It Doesn't Make Someone Else's Life Better
One of the biggest surprises in this interview is how little Mya talks about winning.
Considering her accomplishments in pageantry, modeling, and television, she could easily have spent the entire conversation discussing titles, competitions, and career milestones.
Instead, she repeatedly brings the conversation back to service.
She explains that pageantry pushed her toward community involvement, fundraising, nonprofit work, and becoming a role model. Rather than seeing a crown as the destination, she sees it as permission to serve on a larger scale.
That's a powerful shift in perspective.
Too often success becomes something people collect.
Titles.
Awards.
Followers.
Money.
Recognition.
Eventually those things become goals in themselves.
Mya quietly reminds us that influence isn't something we own.
It's something we borrow.
Whether someone leads five people or five million, the real measure of success is found in how many lives become better because we showed up.
Perhaps that's why her legacy answer is so memorable.
She doesn't want people remembering her for being famous.
She wants them remembering her for using whatever platform she was given well.
That lesson applies far beyond entertainment.
Every one of us has influence somewhere.
The question isn't whether we have a platform.
The question is what we're doing with it.
Lesson Two
Authenticity Is Easier Than Performance
One of the most honest admissions Mya makes is that early in pageantry she spent too much time worrying about how she should act.
She wanted to sound right.
Look right.
Answer perfectly.
Impress judges.
Like many people entering competitive environments, she assumed success required becoming someone slightly different than herself.
Eventually she discovered the opposite.
The moment she stopped trying to perform and simply started having conversations as herself, everything became easier.
Confidence increased.
Interviews flowed naturally.
People connected with her more deeply.
There's a lesson here that reaches far beyond pageants.
Many people spend years performing versions of themselves at work, online, in business, or even within relationships.
Eventually that performance becomes exhausting.
Authenticity removes that burden.
It allows people to spend their energy growing instead of pretending.
Chris reinforces this beautifully by sharing advice he received before launching The Chris & Sandy Show:
"Be and stay authentic."
Years later, that advice still defines both this interview and Mya's story.
People may initially be attracted to excellence.
But they remain because of authenticity.
Lesson Three
Pain Can Become Purpose If We Refuse To Waste It
Grief changes everyone.
The difference lies in what people do next.
For Mya, losing her aunt to breast cancer could have remained one of the saddest chapters of her family's story.
Instead, it became the beginning of something much larger.
She founded All About Pink.
She volunteered.
She partnered with nonprofits.
She organized fundraisers.
She looked for practical ways to help families facing similar circumstances.
None of those actions erase loss.
They do, however, give loss purpose.
Throughout history, some of the greatest organizations, ministries, charities, and movements have been born from someone's deepest wound.
The pain wasn't the ending.
It became the motivation.
Readers may not be called to launch nonprofits.
But everyone experiences pain.
This conversation asks a challenging question:
What if your greatest hurt could eventually become someone else's greatest hope?
That possibility changes everything.
Lesson Four
The People Behind Your Success Deserve To Share In It
One of the healthiest qualities displayed throughout this interview is gratitude.
When Chris asks about her support system, Mya doesn't rush through names.
She tells stories.
She honors sacrifices.
She remembers details.
She acknowledges the countless unseen hours others invested in helping her succeed.
Her mother's long workdays.
Late-night drives.
Coaches.
Teachers.
Friends.
Producers.
Family.
It's a refreshing reminder that success rarely belongs to one individual.
Most accomplishments are actually team victories disguised as personal achievements.
In a culture that often celebrates individual greatness, gratitude keeps people grounded.
The higher someone climbs, the easier it becomes to forget who helped them begin.
Mya shows the opposite.
She understands that recognition shared becomes far more meaningful than recognition kept.
Lesson Five
Confidence Doesn't Mean You'll Never Feel Insecure
One of the refreshing aspects of this interview is that Mya never pretends confidence comes naturally all the time.
Despite competing in pageants, modeling professionally, acting on television, and speaking publicly, she openly admits that she still has moments of self-consciousness. She still experiences insecurity. She still has days where confidence has to be chosen rather than felt.
That honesty matters.
Too often we assume confident people simply wake up fearless. In reality, confidence is usually built through repetition, experience, and the decision to keep showing up despite uncertainty.
Mya's growth illustrates this perfectly.
Early in pageantry she overthought every interview. She wondered how she should sit, speak, answer questions, and present herself. Eventually she realized the strongest version of herself wasn't the carefully rehearsed version.
It was simply herself.
That realization is freeing for anyone trying to accomplish something difficult.
Confidence isn't the absence of fear.
It's becoming comfortable enough with yourself that fear no longer controls your decisions.
Readers can apply this lesson immediately.
Stop waiting until you feel completely ready.
Very few successful people ever do.
Growth often begins the moment authenticity replaces perfection.
Lesson Six
The Way Parents Respond To Failure Can Shape A Lifetime
One of the most powerful parenting moments in the interview comes almost casually.
Mya remembers losing dance competitions when she was younger.
Like every young competitor, she experienced disappointment.
But her mother never allowed failure to become identity.
Instead of criticizing her for losing or comparing her to other dancers, she simply reminded her:
"You don't cry over not winning. You get up and work harder."
What an incredible philosophy.
Notice what her mother didn't say.
She didn't promise that hard work guaranteed victory.
She didn't tell her everyone deserved first place.
She simply redirected disappointment toward growth.
That distinction is incredibly important.
Children don't learn resilience because they never lose.
They learn resilience because trusted adults teach them how to lose well.
In today's culture, where comparison often begins in elementary school and social media magnifies every perceived success or failure, this lesson may be more valuable than ever.
Parents cannot remove disappointment from their children's lives.
But they can teach them how disappointment becomes determination instead of defeat.
Looking at Mya today, it's easy to see those lessons stayed with her.
Every challenge simply became another reason to keep working.
Lesson Seven
Never Forget Where You Came From
Near the end of the interview, Chris asks what may be the deepest question of the entire conversation.
If today's Mya could meet her future successful self, what would she say?
Her answer comes almost instantly.
"You're still just Mya from Connecticut."
Those seven words summarize an entire philosophy of life.
No matter how large someone's platform becomes...
No matter how many followers they gain...
No matter how many awards they receive...
No matter how much money they earn...
Character should remain recognizable.
Humility doesn't minimize success.
It protects it.
History is filled with talented people who lost themselves after achieving the very things they spent years pursuing.
Recognition changed identity.
Fame replaced authenticity.
Success became ego.
Mya hopes to avoid that trap altogether.
Her reminder isn't about staying small.
It's about staying grounded.
That's a lesson every leader, entrepreneur, artist, athlete, parent, and public figure would do well to remember.
The higher we climb, the more important our roots become.
The Single Biggest Lesson From This Interview
If someone remembers only one lesson from this entire conversation five years from now, it should be this:
Success should amplify your character—not replace it.
Everything Mya discusses eventually circles back to this single truth.
Pageants aren't about crowns.
They're about leadership.
Television isn't about fame.
It's about influence.
Social media isn't about followers.
It's about using your voice responsibly.
Community service isn't about appearances.
It's about genuinely helping people.
Even her future dreams aren't centered around becoming more famous.
They're centered around becoming more useful.
That perspective is increasingly rare.
Our culture often encourages people to chase visibility first and purpose second.
Mya reverses that equation.
She believes purpose creates meaningful visibility.
And when success finally arrives, the challenge isn't becoming someone new.
It's remaining the person who worked so hard to get there.
If readers embrace that one principle, this interview continues adding value long after they've forgotten the specific projects discussed.
Top 5 Quotes
Quote One
"You're still just Mya from Connecticut."
Quote Two
"I want people to remember me as somebody who used my platform in a positive way."
Quote Three
"It's okay to be different and it's okay to be you."
Quote Four
"Don't give up. Today might not be your day—but your day is coming."
Quote Five
"You don't cry over not winning. You get up and work harder."
